Culturally enriched

View from the top of the New Museum

Yesterday afternoon my roommates and I went to the New Museum to check out what can only be a collection things that artist Rosemarie Trockel found when she cleaned out her grandma’s attic and then tried to pass off as “art.”

The New York Times gave “Rosemarie Trockel: A Cosmos” a favorable review. But I call BS. I would, however, like to thank Ms. Trockel for an entertaining couple of hours.

Paper birds and a cloud of fur

Before we set off on our trip through the “Cosmos,” we checked out an exhibit called “Walking Drifting Dragging,” which chronicles the journeys of three artists including one guy who traveled from Brazil to New York on foot in a pair of flip flops. While I find this feat to be very impressive in a Jesus kind of way, it’s the artifacts he chose to display that I found to be little lack-luster. Mainly I’m referring to a label with a mermaid on it, which I also have. It’s hanging in my room and I got it off a sardine can from the Goya section at Stop and Shop….just saying.

Anyway, after that we ventured blindly and unknowingly on to the world of Rosmarie Trockel – a German artist who works in all mediums.

“Rosemarie Trockel: A Cosmos” presents an imaginary universe in which Trockel’s own artwork from the past thirty years is juxtaposed with objects and artifacts from different eras and cultures that map many of her artistic interests.- New Museum

First we looked at some of her sketches. My favorite was the blank piece of lined paper. Another favorite from that floor was an infomercial for a “skirt blanket.” Let me summarize: Girl walks into room wearing hideous skirt, girl takes off hideous skirt and drapes it over her legs like a blanket. FIN.

Another film showing was some sort of hybrid silent film/situational comedy/claymation porno starring cockroaches.

This film shows a moth eating fabric.

On the next floor we saw some framed knit blankets. These pieces were on display along side some of the works of Judith Scott. Judith Scott was deaf, mute and had Down Syndrome and her art consists of sculptures that she created by wrapping objects in yarn until they resemble a weird cocoon. These pieces were donated by the Louis-Dreyfus family. Elaine? This may have been the most normal floor, but I was a little creeped out by what mysterious objects could have been hiding behind all that yarn and tape ripped out of a cassette.

At this point I was thinking, “Okay this isn’t really my thing, but whatever.” Then we reached the final floor and I thought, “Rosemarie you sly fox. You’re playing a prank on us all.”

Lobstah

On this floor, we saw some cool antique zoology and botany posters as well as the exoskeleton of a massive lobster, which The New York Times called “one of the more engaging objects on view” – to which I say, you might want to check out the Museum of Natural History if that was your favorite piece. And also, thank you for furthering my point that the most enjoyable pieces were not actually Trockel’s artwork.

I don’t mean to alarm you, baby, but that thing is breathing and I might vomit on you.

I can only describe this room as a nightmare. There was a baby doll in a crib with a fly on its face who was being watched by a babysitter who was preoccupied looking at nude photos. In the crib, the baby had a furry mound that was mechanically “breathing.” The mound’s brother was mounted on the wall. We also saw a red-headed mannequin bust  facing the wall that I was afraid to get too close to because it looked like it might come alive and murder me. Then there was a white tiled room with an upside-down hanging palm tree and some fake birds – but the solitary drawing that was mounted on the wall will haunt me for years to come. It involved a woman and a tarantula and I don’t want to talk about it.

Then we finally made it to a mini-exhibit on the ground floor entitled “HARD” by Judith Bernstein. Here we enjoyed crude paintings of penises “inspired by the graffiti of men’s public bathrooms,” including one painting of the British flag called “Union Jack-off.”

Pretty….

We capped off our trip with some Nacho Libre-style corn at Cafe Habana where Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis ate in “Friends with Benefits.”