Lyrical Genius

As I mentioned before, I have really broadened my musical horizons since starting a long commute to and from work.

And I have found that sometimes a long uninterrupted string of rap music is just the thing to either a.) get my morning going or b.) lull me into a trance-like state so that I don’t really realize I’ve been driving 10 mph for the last 45 minutes (the drone of Drake’s voice is perfect on rainy, trafficky mornings like today).

Anyway, my adventures in Hot 97 have led me to a couple songs that can be described as nothing else but pure poetry….That’s a lie, they can be described as pure ridiculousness.

For your reading pleasure – the two dumbest, most overly-sexual songs I hear in my day-to-day life:

Motivation” – Kelly Rowland feat. Lil’ Wayne

Oh lover, don’t you dare slow down
Go longer, you can last more rounds
Push harder, you’re almost there now
So go lover, make mama proud
And when we’re done, I don’t wanna feel my legs
And when we’re done, I just wanna feel your hands all over me baby
You can’t stop there, music still playin in the background
And you’re almost there
You can do it, I believe in you baby
So close from here

[chorus]
So baby I’m a be your motivation
Go, go, go, go
Motivation
Go, go, go, go

Oh Lover, when you call my name
No other, can do that the same, no
I won’t let you, get up out that game, no
So go lover, go on and make me rain

And when we’re done, I don’t wanna feel my legs baby
And when we’re done,I just wanna feel your hands all over me baby
You can’t stop there, music still playin in the background
And you’re almost there
You can do it, I believe in you baby
So close from here

[chorus]

[Lil Wayne]
Uh, girl I turn that thing into a rain forest
Rain on my head, call that brainstorming
Yeah this is deep, oh, but I go deeper
Make you lose yourself, and finders keepers
It go green light, go Weezy go
I like to taste that sugar, that sweet and low
But hold up wait, new position
I put her on my plate then I do the dishes
She my motivation, I’m her transportation
Cause I let her ride, while I drive her crazy
Then I just keep going going, like I’m racing
When I’m done she hold me like a conversation
Weezy, baby

[Kelly Rowland]
And when we’re done, I don’t wanna feel my legs
And when we’re done, I just wanna feel your hands all over me baby
You can’t stop there, music still playin in the background
And you’re almost there
You can do it, I believe in you baby
So close from here


Let’s highlight some of the best parts: “Push harder, you’re almost there now. So go lover, make mama proud….And you’re almost there. You can do it, I believe in you baby. So close from here.” First of all this sounds like I’m accidentally overhearing Kelly’s Saturday night through the bedroom door – Way awk. and way TMI. Second of all, “make mama proud?” – Eew. Third of all, I don’t know because I’m not a guy, but don’t Kelly’s words of encouragement come off a little patronizing?

I guess Weezy, baby doesn’t take it that way because while Kelly is using every trick in the book to keep him “motivated,” (sucks that that’s necessary bt-dubs) Mr. Wayne is bragging about his performance. “But hold up wait, new position. I put her on my plate then I do the dishes. She my motivation, I’m her transportation. Cause I let her ride, while I drive her crazy.” Do the dishes? I’m not familiar with that one….intrigued.

“When I’m done she hold me like a conversation. Weezy, baby.” I think you’ve had enough conversation for one night; this seems like it involved a little too much talking. Hey Kell, maybe next time you should just read him The Little Engine That Could and he can learn to provide his own motivation. “I think I can, I think I can.”

In the Morning” – J Cole feat. Drake

Baby you summertime fine, I let you get on top, I be the underline
I’m trying to get beside you like the number 9, dime
You fine as hell, I guess I met you for a reason, only time can tell
But well, Im wondering what type of shit you wantin’
Do you like the finer things or you a simple woman
Would you drink with a n-gga, do you smoke weed
Don’t be ashamed, it aint no thing, I used to blow trees
Gettin lifted, I quit but sh-t, I might get high with you
Its only fitting cause I’m looking super fly with you
A flower, you are powerful, you do something to me
cause girl I caught the vibe like you threw something to me
So i threw em back, now all my n-ggas hollerin, who was that
Oh boy, she bad n-gga, what you bout do with that
I’m finna take you home, just sip a little patron
Now we zonin’, baby you so fine

[Chorus]
And can I hit it in the morning
And can I hit it in the morning
And can I hit it in the morning
The sun rising while you moanin’

[Repeat]

[Drake]
Uh, baby you winter time cold
The night is still young, drinking dinner wine slow
I’m trying to make the goose bumps on your inner thigh show
I’ll let you beat me there as far as finish lines go
Yeah, and if you gotta leave for work, I’ll be right here in the same bed that you left me in
I love big women cause my aunt, she rode equestrian
I used to go to the stables and get those kids to bet me
And I would always ride the stallions whenever she let me
I’m joking, I mean that thing is poking
I mean you kinda like that girl that’s in the US Open
I mean I got this hidden agenda that you provoking
I got bath water that you can soak in
Things I could do with lotion
Don’t need a towel, we could dry off in the covers
And when you think you like it, I promise you gonna love it
Yeah, well lights coming through the drapes and we both yawning
I roll over and ask if..

[Chorus – Drake]

[J. Cole]
Hey, hey, God Bless the child that can hold his own
God Bless the woman that can hold patron
God Bless the homegirl that drove us home
No strings attached, like a cordless phone
You see my intentions with you is clear
I’m learning not to judge a woman by the shit that she wears
Therefore, you shouldn’t judge a n-gga off of the shit that you hear
Get all defensive, apprehensive, all because my career
To be fair, I know we barely know each other and yeah
Somehow I wound up in your bed so where we headin from here
Just say you’re scared if you’re scared but if you through frontin’ we can do somethin
And you know just what I’m talking about, tomorrow you’ll be calling out
Cause tonight we getting right into the wee morn’
Cooking n-gga breakfast after sex is like a reward
Then I go my way and you think about me all day, that’s just a warning


Highlights: First off, the chorus is perfection. “Can I hit it in the morning?” is such a great line on its own that you really don’t need anything else – just lather, rinse, repeat. Occasionally spicing things up with “sun rising while you moaning” is probably the only thing that could make it better. I especially like that “morning” and “moaning” not only rhyme in this song, but they are actually the same word (is that cheating, though?)

Now, I think Drake’s verse really makes the song what it is. “I got bath water that you can soak in. Things I could do with lotion.” If a guy said that to me it would be so on! Also, he shows us his sensitive side with a little anecdote about his childhood. He’s really opening up to this girl before hitting it in the morning – gentleman. “I love big women cause my aunt, she rode equestrian. I used to go to the stables and get those kids to bet me and I would always ride the stallions whenever she let me. I’m joking.” Oh, wait never mind. I guess it was a joke….

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